LNH Archives Recent stories by lalo 2008-06-08T07:10:59+00:00 http://www.lnhq.info/people/lalo/issues.atom /img/lnh-icon.png" /img/lnh-icon.png" PicoCMS LNH: 58.5 #44 This One Written By The Lalo From Evilverse http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/44 2008-06-08T07:10:59+00:00 2008-06-08T07:10:59+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>It's April 385th. For 19 days, Cannon Fodder has been crossing universes, looking for the one the Xinerama Brotherhood uses as their base of operations. The New Misfits have been searching for the Time Crapper, who apparently has the Ultimate Gnab, an universe-killing weapon created by the Evilverse LNH. Pantra, the foul-mouthed, badly-behaved leopard girl who came from the future with some of the New Misfits, has been running with them, apparently because it gives her &quot;more things to hit&quot;. Oh, and the leader of the New Misfits, Blackbird, has been captured by the Evilverse equivalent of his group, called the Acla Fright, and replaced by his own Evilversion, Deathbird. The Acla Fright then proceeded to interrogate and kill him. Or so they thought.</p> <blockquote> =============================-=============================</blockquote> <p>...</p> LNH: 58.5 #43 Coming Up With Bad Guys Is Not That Hard http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/43 2008-05-30T23:26:04+00:00 2008-05-30T23:26:04+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Twenty days ago, Cannon Fodder and the New Misfits stopped a Xinerama Brother from imploding the Looniverse. In the weeks before that, they dismantled the Crime Empire, the largest criminal organization their world has ever seen, and <em>that</em> was after repelling an invasion from the Evilverse.</p> <p>But the work of a net.hero never ends. The Xinerama Brotherhood is still out there somewhere, and they will inevitably attack again (Cannon Fodder went looking for them). The Ultimate Gnab, the terrible Evilverse weapon which the Xinerama intended to use, was stolen by a cloaked figure which we're assuming to be the Time Crapper, self-proclaimed mortal enemy of the New Misfits (who went looking for him.) And, worst of all, Pantra decided it would be fun to stick around. OUCH, watch those claws! ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #42 Life, the Looniverse, and Everything http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/42 2008-05-25T07:39:46+00:00 2008-05-25T07:39:46+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Yesterday, Cannon Fodder and the New Misfits stopped a Xinerama Brother from imploding the Looniverse. In the weeks before that, they dismantled the Crime Empire, the largest criminal organization their world has ever seen, and <em>that</em> was after repelling an invasion from the Evilverse.</p> <p>You'd imagine they'd be very busy now tapping each other in the back, wouldn't you?</p> <p>But the work of a net.hero never ends. The Xinerama Brotherhood is still out there somewhere, and they will inevitably attack again. The Ultimate Gnab, the terrible Evilverse weapon which the Xinerama intended to use, was stolen by a cloaked figure which we're assuming to be the Time Crapper, self-proclaimed mortal enemy of the New Misfits. (Yeah, go figure. We don't ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #41 Oh Yeah Baby Gnab Me Harder http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/41 2008-05-23T18:30:41+00:00 2008-05-23T18:30:41+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Back on Sunday, April 57th 2007, Cannon Fodder's and Innovative- Offense Boy's enjoyment of a kiwis-versus-mind-controlled- insects battle was interrupted by a strange figure. His skin was a deep, but reflexive black, like an LCD screen when it's off. For hair, he had three thick strands, running from his eyebrows to the back of his neck; one red, one green, and one blue. His eyes were red, and he had sideburns -- green on his right side, blue on his left. He told them he was a rogue member of the Xinerama Brotherhood, self-appointed guardians of the Usenetverse, and that his brothers had decided to wipe out the Looniverse, for its annoying insistence on using alt.comics.lnh in addition to rec.arts.comics.creative.</p> <p>Almost an year later, or what would be an year if April wasn't dragging on indefinitely, on April 365th, he returned. Cannon ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #40 Will I Really Destroy Everything? http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/40 2008-05-13T20:27:00+00:00 2008-05-13T20:27:00+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously in 58.5:</p> <p>While in a campaign against the Crime Empire, the New Misfits busted a vice den set up specially for comic book addicts; dark, poorly-ventilated rooms, with shelves full of old issues turning the whole place into a maze, pretty girls in costumes (well, they look pretty in the dark, to comic junkies without a life) serving pizza and soda, and paid trolls hanging around to discuss the finer points of Mr. Fantastic's sex life or who'd win in a fight between the Detective Chimp and Howard the Duck.</p> <p>&quot;Um&quot;, said the Amazing Amazon, &quot;I'm not sure this is even illegal, in fact it's kind of cool...&quot;</p> <p>&quot;They don't serve Mr. Paprika&quot;, declared Blackbird. &quot;That <em>has</em> ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #39 Yes I So *Can* Write Kid Recap http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/39 2008-05-09T21:46:56+00:00 2008-05-09T21:46:56+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Hi! Kid Recap here. Funky numbering aside, this issue is more or less the middle of the road for the series. So, the New Misfits and Cannon Fodder asked me to set aside a few minutes and bring you up to date on the story so far. If you're picking up the series now, this is the best issue to start with. If you're pondering whether to pick it up but intimidated by the number, this one is for you. If you just want to recap and refresh your memory -- and who doesn't love a recap? -- then by all means enjoy it. If you did read everything up to now, maybe more than once, and still have no clue what's going on, well then, I guess this issue won't help too much, as it's exactly as badly written as the rest. Sorry!</p> <p>58.5 is a series of fiction stories in a shared universe called &quot;LNH&quot;, which stands for Legion of Net.Heroes, the premier ...</p> Re: LNH: 58.5 #29 Look Ma I can Write Big Events http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/29 2008-05-07T14:27:56+00:00 2008-05-07T14:27:56+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>[gods, I suck, or something. Two months without posting and I forget how to do it?]</p> <p>In another plane of existence, a red-haired girl was intently studying complex diagrams and practicing hand gestures. A beast, larger and more terrible than most minds can cope with, approached and looked at her with the pride of a master.</p> <p>%YOU HAVEN'T LOOKED AT YOUR HOME WORLD IN A LONG TIME.%</p> <p>&quot;What's the point? I have much to do. And since we have accelerated time here, every time I look it's more or less the same thing.&quot; She didn't even look at him.</p> <p>%IT'S NOT THE SAME THING NOW. YOU SHOULD LOOK.% ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #28 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/28 2008-05-04T03:54:45+00:00 2008-05-04T03:54:45+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously on 58.5:</p> <p>Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that April has already lasted for 290 days.</p> <p>A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH from the &quot;Evilverse&quot;. They defeated most of the remaining members of the &quot;real&quot; LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New Misfits got stuck inside it, where they joined the Resistance, which strangely enough, is led by the Crime Empire, which in turn is led by Paraddox (formerly Weirdness Magnet) and Vector Prime (a.k.a. the Melissa Virus). ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #27 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/27 2008-02-22T15:13:34+00:00 2008-02-22T15:13:34+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously on 58.5:</p> <p>Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that April has already lasted for 290 days.</p> <p>A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH from the &quot;Evilverse&quot;. They defeated most of the remaining members of the &quot;real&quot; LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New Misfits got stuck inside it, where they joined the Resistance, which strangely enough, is led by the Crime Empire, which in turn is led by Paraddox (formerly Weirdness Magnet) and Vector Prime (a.k.a. the Melissa Virus). ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #26 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/26 2008-02-16T04:10:24+00:00 2008-02-16T04:10:24+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously on 58.5:</p> <p>Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that April has already lasted for 290 days.</p> <p>A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH from the &quot;Evilverse&quot;. They defeated most of the remaining members of the &quot;real&quot; LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New Misfits got stuck inside it, where they joined the Resistance, which strangely enough, is led by the Crime Empire, which in turn is led by Paraddox (formerly Weirdness Magnet) and Vector Prime (a.k.a. the Melissa Virus). ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #25 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/25 2008-02-11T01:43:07+00:00 2008-02-11T01:43:07+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously on 58.5:</p> <p>Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that April has already lasted for 289 days.</p> <p>A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH from the &quot;Evilverse&quot;. They defeated most of the remaining members of the &quot;real&quot; LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New Misfits got stuck inside it, where they joined the Resistance, which strangely enough, is led by the Crime Empire, which in turn is led by Paraddox (formerly Weirdness Magnet) and Vector Prime (a.k.a. the Melissa Virus). ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #24 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/24 2008-02-08T10:24:38+00:00 2008-02-08T10:24:38+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>Previously on 58.5:</p> <p>Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that April has already lasted for 285 days.</p> <p>A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH from the &quot;Evilverse&quot;. They defeated most of the remaining members of the &quot;real&quot; LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New Misfits got stuck inside it, where they joined the Resistance, which strangely enough, is led by the Crime Empire, which in turn is led by Paraddox (formerly Weirdness Magnet) and Vector Prime (a.k.a. the Melissa Virus). ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #23 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/23 2008-02-04T22:23:06+00:00 2008-02-04T22:23:06+00:00 Lalo Martins Previously on 58.5:<br/> <br/> Since the beginning of April, one LNHer (sometimes more) was<br/> picked as leader, every day, and disappeared at midnight. That<br/> wouldn't be such a big deal, if it wasn't for the fact that<br/> April has already lasted for 285 days.<br/> <br/> A few weeks ago, the Looniearth was invaded by an alternate LNH<br/> from the "Evilverse". They defeated most of the remaining<br/> members of the "real" LNH, and took over Net.ropolis. President<br/> Luthor then decided to seal the city in a force field. The New<br/> Misfits got stuck inside it, but what can a few newbie heroes do<br/> against an entire LNH with "no redeeming qualities"?<br/> <br/> =============================-=============================<br/> ... LNH: 58.5 #22 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/22 2008-02-01T20:05:10+00:00 2008-02-01T20:05:10+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>[semi-Acraphobe warning: nudity, graphical violence, sexual suggestions, nothing too serious I think]</p> <p>&quot;That's a hero's death&quot;, said the humanoid kiwi.</p> <p>&quot;I'd agree if I agreed with the field at all&quot;, answered Sgt. Lauro Graziani, a few breaths away from his death after being blasted by a powerful Evilverse LNHer. &quot;As it is, I think it's a coward's choice, and I'm not prepared to die for it. Help me out here?&quot;</p> <p>&quot;What are you trying to do?&quot;</p> <p>&quot;I have a small statue in my pocket. A god I've chosen to worship and who has been pretty good at protecting me. I want ...</p> LNH: 58.5 #21 http://www.lnhq.info/archives/58.5/21 2008-01-27T07:58:54+00:00 2008-01-27T07:58:54+00:00 Lalo Martins <p>&quot;We need more net.a.humans to help us install--&quot; Dramatic Pause Lass plugged a small device into the television, which came to life showing some diagrams. Sammy and Daniel whistled. &quot;This.&quot;</p> <p>&quot;I'm sure Contraption Boy and Analytic are very impressed&quot;, said Blackbird, &quot;but for most of us, these diagrams are completely meaningless. Care to educate us?&quot;</p> <p>Contraption Boy was the one to speak up, however. &quot;It's a mesh-networked, AI-powered hive of force field generators. They would work together to compensate any kind of attempt to get past them. Matter, energy, anything... although this one seems to be programmed to let sunlight through.&quot;</p> <p>&quot;For a very strict definition of sunlight, yes&quot;, said a soldier ...</p>