Issue seven. Not much to say. Have a nice day! =)
Oh yeah, and wReam, if you're out there, can I use Self-Righteous
Preacher in my Culinary Disaster story? Please? =)
Thanks again for the reviews guys:
Jamas Enright
Ian Porell
Pam VanMuijen
Carolyn Vaughan
=========================================================================
DERELICT Press Presents
The seventh issue of
/~~\/~~\ {] /~~\ (^^^ || ***** /~~\
/ /\/\ \ [) ~\__ (^^ || ,' ~\__
/__/ \__\ (} \__/ ( || ', \__/
" Going Places "
A psuedo-Acraphobe title
._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._.
An overhead shot of a red Porsche convertible driving down a
highway. Faq Boy is driving, one hand on the steering wheel, his arm
draped casually across the back of the passenger seat where Paytan sits,
fuming. Savannah is in the back, staring at the the door lock button.
Brit is next to her, Binky held tightly in her hands, watching Faq Boy
with a raised eyebrow.
)()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
" Weyelllllll... I've got the station wagon if you need it," said
JoDean as she walked Fuzzy, Paytan, and California Kid back downstairs.
"I should get back to Bob soon, the house is probably in shambles by now,
and who knows what he's done to the silo. But if you can get it back by
this evening, then everything'll be fine. You don't mind the occasional
acid stain on the back seats do you? Sometimes my experiments act up a
little while they're being transported, but really it's nothing as long
as you put the rubber slipcover down and watch your feet - "
" No, it's okay," interrupted Fuzzy hurridly," Just promise us
you'll stop this mad scientist buissness for a while." Aunt JoDean
frowned.
" Well, if Bob's finished with hobby for a while, then I'm sure I
can hold off on mine for a little while too. Than man is so exasperating.
Why do I put up with it? Because I love him, that's why. Still, that
doesn't mean I don't want to club him over the head sometimes," she said.
Fuzzy sighed in relief. She did not want to try to explain JoDean to the
rest of the LNH in general, and the Ultimate Ninja in particular. It
would not be happy. Paytan began to drop back slowly, until only
California Kid and Fuzzy were walking JoDean down the hall. She stopped
in the middle of the hallway, head down and looking at her sword. Dirmarw
glowed dimly in the darkness.
The other three came to the top of the big staircase leading down
to the entrance doors, and Aunt JoDean stumbled to a halt. She fidgeted
nervously with her glasses for a moment then glanced up at Fuzzy.
" Do me a favor will you? Could you watch Brittany? We've been
kinda worried about her back home," she asked.
" Sure," Fuzzy shrugged," Why?" JoDean shrugged and smiled
wildly, flipping her glasses onto her face and twirling her finger around
the chain.
" Oh nothing, really. You know how she tends to get into things.
Villains, and mind-control and... villains and stuff. You know. We're
just never quite sure of where she is!" JoDean grinned and glanced away,
then suddenly scurried forwards, down the stairs and outside towards
the two young net.heroes on the curb. Fuzzy headed slowly after her,
watching her thoughtfully.
Curbside, a young boy had worked up enough courage to speak to
Brittany. He stuck out his hand, clutching the pad of paper and pen in
it.
" You're Weirdness Girl, right?" he asked. Brit raised an eyebrow
and nodded cautiously, setting Binky carefully on the curb beside her.
The kid handed her the paper, and backed up a few steps. "Could I have
your signature?"
" Ummm, okay," said Brit. She looked at him oddly for another
minute, then shrugged and scribbled out her code name in rather messy
cursive and handed it back to him. A grin split the kid's face from ear
to ear.
" Thanks," he said, and ran off to his friends," Hey guys, guess
what! Lookit this! I got Kid Kirby's girlfriend's signature!" Brit's
eyebrow shot up to about hairline level as the group of children
clustered around the proud signature-holder.
She considered going over to the children and explaining nicely
to them that, no, she was not, never had been, and was not planning to
be, Kid Kirby's girlfriend. She considered grinning wildly and buying Kid
Kirby a big bouquet of roses. She was still working on option number
three when the big red Porsche convertible pulled up in front of her,
with a spandexed net.hero in the driver's seat. He smiled at her. She
sighed and stood up, tapping Savannah on the shoulder. The younger
net.heroine dragged her gaze over onto the car, and her mouth dropped
open.
" Hi!" said Brit, and waved,"I'm Weirdness Girl, this is
Out-of-It Lass, and this is Binky." The goldfish in question was burbling
away in the fishbowl, watching an ant crawl across the pavement. The
net.hero smiled back.
" I'm Faq Boy. A friend of mine was surfing the newgroups and saw
you in trouble. I thought I could come by and give you a ride," he
smiled again, and the sun gleamed across the red lines of the car.
" Well then, you won't be needing the station wagon will you? No,
of course not!" nattered JoDean, then with a worried look at the
approaching Fuzzy she hugged Brit," Have a wonderful time, dear, and be
careful. I love you, and be sure to show up at the next family reunion!"
" Love you too," said Brittany, and then her Aunt was zooming
off, making a wide circuit around Fuzzy and California Kid, fluttering
back into the observatory and her lair. Brit sighed and glanced towards
Fuzzy and CK. "Hey guys! Where's Paytan?" Fuzzy stopped and looked back
at the observatory.
" She was right behind us," she said," Maybe she took a wrong
turn somewhere."
" I'll go get her," sighed Brit, and set off in the same
direction her Aunt had gone, leaving Faq Boy to the dawning realization
that while the Porsche could seat five, there were six net.heroes that
needed to be accommodated.
-=ð=- -=ð=-
Paytan leaned against the wall in the empty hallway, eyes closed,
listening to the voice whispering inside of her mind.
...to me, Paytan. There are those who wield sorcerous power in
the Legion of Net.Heroes. I have felt the ripples their passage
generates. I have felt the workings of their magics. I have felt their
power, Paytan. It is power we must have, if we are to win back my home
from those who have stolen it from me and mine, rasped the sword. I
shelter you when you are summoned, I hide the memories in the deep places
of your mind, and tear from you the changes the demons make while you are
there. And in return you swore to me that my homeland would be regained.
You swore, cursed child! Am I owed nothing for my labors?!
" I'm sorry," wailed Paytan," I can't! What do you want me to do?
Charm them, control their minds? You've barely even taught me the basics
of spellcasting, let alone that!" In her mind's eye she could see the
paltry spells she knew barrel towards the LNH mages and shatter into dust
on their shields. See them turn, eyes glowing a deep and bloody red, and
burn the flesh from her body, leaving only blackened bones.
I teach you, Paytan. But you are not learning as fast as you
should. You're still looking for a way out, and there isn't one. You
cannot erase the past, or the future. Do you think that one day you will
speak a word, and the very Lords of Hell will tremble at your feet? You
are nothing to them. I am nothing to them. We are alone in the world, the
two of us, and only magic can hold your nightmares at bay, and bring me
back my world, said Dirmarw.
The sword glimmered dimly in the shadows, pale green lights
running up and down it's length. Beneath it's straight-edged silvery
blade was the shadow of something else. A weapon made of a different and
far older material, twisted and shattered, torn and burnt, papered over
with a pretty illusion one could see through if one looked hard enough...
" But your people are dead, aren't they?" she whispered,"You said
so yourself. If you're the last one, your world will still be empty,
even if you do win it back from the demons. What does it matter?"
IT MATTERS TO ME!, screamed the sword. YOU DID NOT SEE THEM DIE,
PAYTAN! YOU DID NOT SEE THEIR BODIES TORN BY ELDRITCH MAGICS, BY
DEMONCLAWS! I WILL AVENGE THEM! I WILL BURY THEIR BODIES UNDER THE SHADOW
OF THE GLASS TOWER AND PUT THEIR SPRIRITS AT REST! YOU HAVE SWORN TO ME
YOU WILL HELP!! STOP CHASING AFTER DREAMS AND FANTASIES AND LISTEN TO
WHAT I TEACH YOU! LISTEN, DO YOU HEAR ME, LISTEN!!
" I HEAR YOU!! STOP IT! YOU'RE TOO LOUD!" screamed Paytan and
dropped to her knees, grabbing the sword and hurling it into the opposite
wall. They sat in silence for a minute, Paytan sucking in deep breaths of
air and trying to get control of herself again. The inside of her skull
rang with the sword's words, a dull pounding headache bouncing back forth
behind her eyes.
It was then Brittany came running around the corner, neon orange
and electric blue trenchcoat flapping behind her.
" Hey Paytan! Guess what?! There's this guy outside with a car
and... Hey, Payt? You okay?" Brit stumbled to a stop then crouched down
beside her friend. "What happened?"
" Nothing," grated Paytan and pulled herself to her feet," I'm
just tired." Just a little longer, she thought to herself, just a little
longer, hold on and you'll be fine... Brit looked up at her for a moment,
then stood and wandered over to Dirmarw. She picked him up carefully by
the hilt.
" Here," she offered,"I'll take him outside - "
" No, I'll take him," said Paytan. She took the sword from Brit
and hefted it once, then swung it viciously against the wall. The clang
echoed back forth down the entire hallway, but by the time it faded away
Paytan was already gone, Brittany trailing carefully behind her, eyes
wide.
-=ð=- -=ð=-
Paytan stalked out of the building a minute or two later with
hunched shoulders and one hand curled so tightly around Dirmarw's hilt
her knuckles were white. Brit trotted cautiously after her, skirting
around California Kid, who stood admiring the Porsche from the front of
the walkway. Fuzzy, who had been leaning over the passenger side door
talking to Faq Boy, turned around.
" Hey you two. Looks like there's only room for four more in the
car. California Kid and I can get back on our own, but you three I don't
quite trust. Especially not after that big mech episode you had in the
middle of the city. Faq Boy swears blind he'll take you guys back to the
LNHHQ, and I'm going to hold him to it. If I find out you got wrapped up
in something else while I was gone, you all are going to be in _deep_
trouble, clear?" Savannah nodded grimly, eyes boring into Fuzzy as she
fumbled at the handle for the back door.
" Yep, will do, will do!" said Brittany, sweeping up Binky and
opening the door for Savannah. She waited for the younger girl to get in
first then hopped in beside her. Paytan took one look at Faq Boy in the
front seat, and set her sights on the third empty space in the back. Just
as she reached the back door he leaned across front seat and opened the
passenger door.
" Your chariot awaits m'lady."
" Thanks," muttered Paytan, casting a wistful glance at the empty
expanse of leather in the back as she got in, closing the door after her.
Faq Boy waved casually at the two adult net.heroes and the Porsche
squealed away from the curb. Fuzzy sighed, offered up a silent prayer to
the heavens, then wandered back up the drive to ask JoDean if she
wouldn't mind her station wagon being borrowed after all.
-=ð=- -=ð=-
They had pulled onto Summer Avenue a few minutes later, speeding
down the street, wind blowing through their hair. Brittany was sticking
her head over the side of the car, showing Binky the oncoming traffic.
Paytan was glaring out through the windshield, brooding. Faq Boy watched
her out of the corner of his eye.
Paytan was off in her own world, one hand loosely gripping
Dirmarw's hilt. Her thoughts were still running around and around
Dirmarw's `speech'. There had to be a way to halt the summonings. There
had to be. She knew she couldn't deal with them the rest of her life.
Every day waking and never knowing if she'd still be there at the end of
it. Wincing everytime someone accidentally tore something, a minor
version of the dimensional portal rising up from her memories. Talking to
someone, a friend, or even someone she didn't even know, and then being
ripped away in an instant, coming to days later with only blanked
memories and bad dreams to show for it. If she could find the right
spells, she might be able to block them. Make sure she'd never be
summoned again, ever. If only she could get her hands on a grimoire of
some sort... but Dirmarw said she shouldn't trust the mages. She would
be, said the sword, an excellent commodity for any wizard, if spelled and
bound properly. The wizards were LNH, yes, but that didn't mean they'd
told the superhero organization everything about themselves. After all,
she certainly hadn't. And she had a vague feeling that Brit hadn't quite
eith -
" Hey! Are you okay?" asked Faq Boy again, grabbing her lightly
by the shoulder. Paytan jumped.
" Yeah, I'm fine," she muttered," Sorry. I pulled a Savannah."
She grinned and glanced into the back seat. Savannah was deeply involved
in studying the door lock mechanism, oblivious to all around her. Like
always. Faq Boy smiled at her.
" I was worried you'd been possessed by a villain or something
for a sec," he said," You sure you're okay?" His arm stayed on her
shoulder and crept back around behind her neck. Paytan tensed.
" No, I'm fine. I just drifted off."
" That's good. After, all if you ever did get grabbed by a
villain I'd have to save you, and after that you'd owe me a kiss..." His
fingers gently stroked her right ear, and he leaned towards her a little
more. Paytan snarled and slammed her head back into the headrest. She
swept her left hand around and grabbed Faq Boy's right shoulder, swinging
her other fist directly into his gut. The net.hero gagged and dropped his
head forwards, where it got slammed into the steering wheel by Paytan's
left fist. She leaned over and grabbed his ear.
" Don't touch me," she growled," Never again, or I'll make sure
most of your internal organs become external organs."
" Guys! Oncoming traffic, guys!" yelled Brittany. The Porsche had
been left to it's own devices for the past fifteen seconds or so, and it
seemed the car had decided to make a break for freedom. Directly across
the opposite lane. Brit shoved Binky into Savannah's lap, made sure the
younger net.heroine had a good hold on him, then threw herself in between
the back of the driver and front passenger seats, directly on top of
Paytan and Faq Boy. She reached forwards and grabbed the steering wheel,
wrenching it back to the left. The Porsche swerved out of the oncoming
traffic and barely avoided bouncing off of a station wagon in the lane
next to it. It shot back across it's own lanes of traffic and roared up
onto the curb with cracking sound as one of the axels careened off a
cement bench. Pedestrians ran.
" Brakes! BRAKES, Faq Boy, if you want to live!" Brit risked
releasing one of her hands from the wheel and bapped him on the head. He
somehow managed to swing one of his feet onto the correct pedal, and
rammed it to the floor. The car screeched to a halt, sending Brit sailing
over the front seats, clipping the windshield and landing heavily on the
hood. Faq Boy was thrown into the steering wheel again and Paytan hit the
dashboard with her shoulder, Dirmarw leaving a shallow but painful gash
in her lower calf. Savannah, the only one of the four who had put on and
was still wearing her seatblet, narrowly avoided a minor case of
whiplash, but was otherwise unharmed. Binky sloshed some water onto the
leather interior.
Everything was very still for a second or two after that, until
Paytan kicked open her door and got out, leaving a bloody smear on the
interior where her leg brushed against it. She walked over to the other
side of the car and helped Savannah with her seatbelt, then took Binky
from her and walked to the front of the car where she helped the quietly
grumbling Brit to her feet. Faq Boy stayed in the car.
They walked the rest of the way.
-=ð=- -=ð=-
The three of them stumbled into the HQ a while later. Paytan's
leg had begun to throb painfully, the slash overlaying the slowly fading
bruises she'd picked up from her too-close encounter with the manga-mech,
and she was still in an incredibly foul mood over the entire day. Which
is why she did not react well to Entropy Kid's news when they met him in
the hallway.
" You're wanted upstairs," he said," they want to do some
modifications on the flight.thingee you took out this morning."
" Well, THEY can just go SHOVE IT MMMRMPHhpmhh - " Paytan glared
at Brittany and pried her hand from her mouth. " Okay, okay, no more
yelling. Bloody hell." Entropy Kid nodded and smiled, unable to add
anything more to the conversation. Distantly he wondered why they were
walking in the front door when they technically should have been coming
in from the flight bay.... Oh well. He could ask someone about it
tomorrow.
They stopped on the next landing and thought for a minute. Point
one - would anyone react well to the fact that the flight.thingee had
been taken by persons unkown? No. Point two - If they explained nicely
that it hadn't been their fault, would everything be hunky dory again?
Probably not. Point three - If they somehow got it back again without
anyone noticing, could they probably come up with a good excuse for being
late? Yes.
A few minutes later a red Porsche convertible slunk into the
parking lot. Faq Boy saw the specialized speed and radar flight.thingee
roar overhead, and wondered sourly for a moment who was going out at this
hour of the night. Then he shrugged and went inside.
_________________________________________________________________________
Binky, Dirmarw, JoDean Out-of-It Lass, Perdition, Weirdness Girl,
copyright Jennifer Whitson, 1995. California Kid is Public Domain.
Entropy Kid is Public Domain. Fuzzy is Public Domain. Faq Boy is Jamas
Enright's, and used with permission.
NEXT ISSUE:
Okay, okay, _next time_ the subplot's going to be dealt with.
Really. I mean it's kind a getting dealt with here. Sorta. I'm
building up, okay!??
Ummm, Okay, now you can look Ma. There's the villains, over there,
in the next issue! See 'em?
=========================================================================
------
.sig is living in jungle with pack of wolves and refuses to come back.
