Hey there everybody! It's me again. Issue three should be out the
weekend after next, and I'll probably stay bi-monthly from now on. This
one's early because, well, I had lotsa time to write over vacation and
this is what happened.
It wasn't supposed to be a massive fight scene, but it turned out that way
anyways. Next issue will be better, at least in that catagory. Again,
criticisms and comments welcome.
And a a huge big ol' thanks to:
Rene Villareal
Jamas Enright
Hubert Bartels
H. Jameel al Khafiz
Ben Rawluk
DoomMonger of the LNH/Specter ;=)
Jaelle
for sending replies last time. =)
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DERELICT Press Presents
The second issue of
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" Just Another Hole, or Two, or Three... in the Pavement "
A psuedo-Acraphobe title
It was early afternoon by the time they got into downtown
Net.ropolis, and still no signs of Evil. Brittany, aka Weirdness Girl led
the way with Binky in her arms, cheerfully grinning at any pedestrian who
didn't get out of the way fast enough. She was attired in a black spandex
bodysuit sprinkled liberally with red sparkles, red chrome wrist bracers
and shin guards, a large brilliant orange trenchcoat, and a pair of old
white sneakers with little pictures of fish doodled all over them in pen.
Paytan(Perdition) and Savannah(Out-of-It Lass) followed behind her, in
streetclothes. Paytan sighed, idly swinging her sword in wide arcs in
front of her. Most of the pedestrian traffic moved nervously to the other
side of the street.
" Brittany, we're - "
" Weirdness Girl."
" - not getting anywhere just walking around town. We aren't
cleared to take out a flight thingie, I managed to loose my drivers'
liscence sometime during our trip through the hells, we don't have money
for a taxi, and we're not attracting villains just walking around like
this. I say we go back to the HQ," said Paytan. Brittany grumbled
something under her breath then darted suddenly to the left, grabbing
hold of a hapless pedestrian.
" Hi!," she said," I'm Weirdness Girl - "
" Brittany."
" - of the LNH, and my compatriots and I were wondering if you've
seen any Evil skulking about lately. You know, men in black, guys who
laugh a lot and scream about world domination, that sort of thing?"
The man shook his head mutely, then tore out of her grasp and
walked quickly away. Rule #1 or Net.ropolis Survival: Thou shalt not
associate with heroes, lest they drag you into some cosmic-spanning
plotline that puts you, your family, your pets, and your Great Uncle Sid
who's been dead five years in mortal danger.
" Maybe it's afraid of us," sighed Brit, kicking at a bit of
loose pavement.
" Well the pedestrians are, that's for sure. C'mon lets go back
and get some lunch," Paytan stopped and half turned, then groaned
inwardly as Brittany shook her head stubbornly.
" No. I bet they just can't find us," Brit made sure the street
was clear then jumped off the sidewalk and ran out into the middle of it.
There she paused, feet wide apart, hand on hip, head thrown back, in the
classic `hero taking on the universe' pose. Paytan rolled her eyes.
" HEY YOU!!! EVIL! HERE WE ARE! HAVE YOU NO HONOR?! HAVE YOU NO
PRIDE?!"
" Brittany, Evil technically doesn't have honor, pride maybe, but
no honor," said Paytan," Although - "
" Shush. HERE WE ARE, THREE NET.HEROES, OUT IN PLAIN SIGHT AND
YOU HAVE THE GALL TO _NOT SHOW UP_!! WHAT KIND OF EVIL ARE YOU,
ANYWAYS?!" Brit paused, waiting. A few pedestrians looked at her
fearfully and left the area, but other than that everything was quiet.
Paytan snickered.
Then they heard it.
From just around the corner came the sound of creaking metal, and
that strange whirr-click sound that all mechs and/or cyborgs make. And it
was getting closer. Brittany looked over at Paytan, surprised. A huge
herd of Net.ropolis citizens came around the corner, moving at a fast
trot down the street away from the impending battle. Various stores along
the street pulled down steel shutters and bars in front of their windows
and doors. One ingenious shopkeeper flipped on a force field he had
pirated from some of the wreckage left over from Robot Invasion, and sat
back to watch the show.
" Oh great Brit, you picked up some kind of killer robot.
Perfect. The first villain type we get and it's probably armed with
nukes," Paytan grabbed Savannah and shoved her back into an alleyway.
Brittany kept looking surprised.
" Hey neat, it worked!" she said. Paytan reappeared from the
depths of the alley, glaring. She opened her mouth to reply, then froze,
staring.
Coming around the corner was a big mechbot, the kind you can put
a human controller inside with all sorts of nifty laser weapons and
high-speed reactions and stuff. This one was painted bright red and
yellow with electric blue highlighting. It looked decidedly manga-ish.
It's right arm ended in a massive laser cannon, the left in a robotic
hand edged in blades. The robot's controller grinned evily from behind
the clear faceplate, watching Brit.
" Foolish baka," came the voice, hollow and souless, filtered
through the robot's systems and speakers," to search out wrath of a true
denizen of REC.ARTS.MANGA!!" Brittany winced as the villain's volume
level soared. Paytan flattened herself against the wall and began to move
unnoticed toward the back of the manga-mech. Which left Brittany to be
the distraction a.k.a target practice. She grinned widely, stooped down
to put Binky behind the base of a streetlight, then took a few dozen
steps to the left. Then she posed, again.
" Halt, foolish villain! Do you think I would come alone into the
city, and invite the wrath of those like yourself if I did not have the
power to protect myself? Do you think me a weakling? I have the power to
shift the very earth, to snuff a star as I would a candle! The Dvandom
Stranger himself trembles at my passing!" she yelled. Rather impressively
too, for someone who had no idea what she was doing. The guy in the
machine just kept grinning.
" Manga Man will appreciate me all the more then, for giving him
a more powerful prisoner net.hero to convert to his cause!" The
manga-mech began to move forward, laser cannon glowing threateningly. By
now, Paytan was parallel with the thing, just a few more feet and she'd
be able to circle around behind it.
" Wait! Wait! If you try to capture me now, my, uh, one true
love, Kid Kirby will come after you! He would tear reality apart to save
me! Would you dare suffer the wrath of TWO cosmic forces?!" The massive
machine paused for a moment, considering. Then somehow it managed to
shrug. Paytan did a double-take from her position against the wall, then
shook her head and kept moving.
" IKUZEEEEIIIIIIIII!!"
" I guess you'd dare then, huhAAAAAaaaa! No killing the
net.heroine! Bad thing! Bad! Crap," Brittany dove off to the side and
rolled as a laser blast splintered a small tree and tore into the cement
road where she'd just been standing. Paytan glared at the thing, wincing
a little when the laser blast hit pavement. She half-moved away from the
wall and towards the mech, then froze and stepped back again.
Brittany looked up at the robot from where she crouched, grinning
hopefully. The thing took aim again with the cannon. How it planned on
taking Weirdness Girl in as a prisoner after burning her to cinders was
anyone's guess. Brittany dodged again and another swath of pavement was
torn up. She began looking for a weapon.
Paytan bit her lip, watching, then pounded her fist into the wall
and closed her eyes.
" Could you help a little with this one?" she whispered to the
sword. She cocked her head to one side as if listening to something just
beyond the range of hearing. "Thanks," she whispered in reply, then
gasped and fell back against the wall for a second. When Paytan looked
back up, something else was in control, watching things coldly from
behind her eyes. It/She moved silently up behind the manga-mech, breaking
into a dash halfway there. The mech began to turn, it's motion sensors
going off, but by then the fledgling net.heroine was in too close,
swinging the sword into the mech's leg before it could react. The sword
sheared through half of it's left leg with the screech of tortured metal,
pale green lightning flickering around the blade. Paytan/Not-Paytan
dragged the sword out of the tangled mess of metal and wires,
backpedaling swiftly, but not swift enough to avoid the manga-mech's left
arm as it swung around, sending it/her into the air before cracking
solidly into a shopfront. The thing turned and took aim with the laser
cannon, then jerked as something clunked off it's armored body.
It was Brittany, throwing rocks at it. Or torn up chunks of
pavement, whichever came to hand. Stupid girl. It chuckled tonelessly to
itself, then turned back to Paytan. Only she/it wasn't there anymore.
The proximity sensors went off from behind it, and the manga-mech
tried frantically to turn itself around. But when it's left leg began to
move the metal tore and more of the vital wire connections were severed.
So it settled for firing wild shots behind itself. Two more rocks bounced
off it's exterior, and Paytan/Not-Paytan went into a flurry of dodges.
Which, technically, she shouldn't have been able to do. When one
is hurled into a wall, one usually isn't up to high speed movement within
the next minute or so. Something was grabbing her muscles, her balance
systems, and forcing them to work, whether they wanted to or not. Which
would probably hurt a lot in the morning. The first two laser bolts tore
through the steel and brick front of a dairy, sending metal shards and
bits of brick shooting out like shrapnel. Paytan/Not-Paytan managed to
dodge most of it, and began to move back towards the mech.
The dairy store explosion echoed up and down the length of the
alley, and Savannah blinked, slowly scanning the area.
" Oh my, we seem to have gotten into a fight," she made her way
slowly to the edge of the alley, and peered out. The first thing she saw
was Brittany, stooping to pick up (yes, you guessed it) another rock.
The air was thick with dust, and Brit had a fine coating of it all over
her. Savannah stepped outside.
" Hey, Brittany, what's going on?"
" 'Vana, get back! There's a big mech-thingee off to my left!"
Savannah obligingly skittered backwards, dragging her vision off
Brittany, over torn up piles of pavement and dirt, and onto the
manga-mech. Whereupon she backed up even more. It stood half-turned, left
leg hanging by a few metallic cords, sun glittering off metal and paint,
flashing off the laser gun as it fired shot after shot. Savannah
squinted, and looked closer.
Meanwhile Paytan/Not-Paytan had finally gotten in close enough
for another shot. Moving with unnatural grace, she/it swung the sword
again, towards the thing's main body. The mech reacted fast enough to
bring up the laser gun to block, and the sword went shearing into that
instead, cutting through one of the barrels and halfway into the next
one. It yanked the laser gun arm upwards, trying to dislodge the sword,
instead bringing Paytan/Not-Paytan directly in front of the faceplate.
For a single second the mech's controller stared into the eyes of
something infinitely older, and much more more powerful than he. And then
it was gone, just as quickly as it had come, and the only thing looking
out from behind Paytan's eyes was Paytan herself, who froze for an
instant, and, finding herself face to face with a massive mech, panicked.
She let go of the sword and dropped to the ground in a crouch,
then threw herself out of the way as the mech's fist careened towards
her, shattering the pavement yet again. Once she'd gotten a few feet away
of course she realized her mistake: It wasn't a good idea to leave your
only weapon stuck in your adversary. Too late. The manga-mech fired with
it's three remaining barrels, and Paytan dodged frantically, ensuring
that road would not be passable anytime within the next year or so.
Savannah stood in the mouth of the alleyway, ignored by all the
combatants, staring intently at the manga-mech, eyes flicking here and
there over it's body. Abruptly she blinked.
" Brittany! The faceplate! Go for the faceplate with the rocks,
it's only glass!" she yelled. Brittany glanced over at her then grinned,
nodded her thanks and lifted up another chunk of pavement just as the
thing took aim at Paytan again.
" Hey you, watch out!" The mech looked at Brit," I've got another
rock!" Clunk. The pavement chunk bounced off the mech's shoulder, and
Brittany wished she had practiced pitching instead of outfielding in her
family's baseball games. Oh well, only one thing to do then. She dodged
the shot the thing fired off at her before it turned back to Paytan, then
picked up a nice sharp piece of cement and sprinted towards the mech.
A few seconds later the mech began to seriously consider getting
proximity alamrs with a wider range, as something leaped onto it's back
and began climbing. It swung it's right arm up to grab at Brit, and
Paytan dodged inwards, grabbed her sword and wrenched it out of the laser
gun, dodging behind the manga-mech and hacking at it's back. The sword
made two deep cuts into the metal, and sparks began to fly as one of the
mech's powerpacks was destroyed. The mech stopped grabbing at Brittany
and reached around with it's right arm, grabbing Paytan's shoulder and
flinging her across the street. She went limp, but still landed badly
against a pile rubble.
The sword clattered dully on the pavement, and this time Paytan
didn't get up. Brit saw from her perch on the thing's head, and her eyes
narrowed. She raised the rock above her head and brought it down with all
of her strength, the faceplate shattering inwards, glass shards cutting
into the controller's face. He screamed, and Brit hung in down in front
of the shattered faceplate and shoved her fist down his throat.
The robot staggered backwards jerkily, the controller trying
instictually to back away from the angry net.heroine, and it's leg tore
off completely, sending the mech rolling to the ground, Brit still
hanging precariously over it's front as it went down. When it hit, one of
it's remaining powerpacks went, a small explosion tearing through the
manga-mech's back. It's arms and remaining leg scrabbled uselessly at
the ground for a moment, like a turtle's, until it finally caught hold
of Brit's trenchcoat, yanking her off and tossing her away.
It lay there a moment, systems and alarms going off like crazy,
then spoke weakly, it's once souless and imposing voice now rather tinny
and fake-sounding.
" Automatic self destruct sequence initiated. One controller to
transmat, on my word. Now," the man flickered and faded, replaced by an
outline of static which collapsed inside itself a second later. From
inside the manga-mech a robotic voice began countdown. TEN. NINE.
From behind a pile of rubble, Paytan groaned and raised her head,
then winced and let it fall back again, sliding back into
unconsciousness. Brittany lay a few yards from the robotic hulk,
unconscious. EIGHT.
Savannah watched her intently, then moved out from the alleyway
at a run. Almost immediatley she tripped over one of the ruts made by a
stray laser blast, falling to her hands and knees. SEVEN.
Oh well, it'd be safer this way anyways. She started crawling
towards Brit's prone form. SIX.
Halfway there. FIVE.
She reached Brit's body, grabbed her shoulders and slowly began
to back up. FOUR.
Damn, tripped again. THREE.
Halfway back to the alley, but crawling backwards and dragging
Brit at the same time was too slow. TWO.
Two thirds there, not enough time. ONE.
Savannah closed her eyes, prayed, and threw herself and Brit
behind a stray pile of rubble. BING.
The explosion disintegrated all the concrete and dirt underneath
it within a five foot radius, sending rocky shrapnel rocketing outwards
into building fronts, trees, and off the one force field. Every form of
plant life in the immediate was was blown to shreds, and telephone poles
were bent at 45 degree angles. Paytan moaned again from where she lay, as
the rock bits that ricoched off the brick wall nearby cracked into the
pavement next to her. Savannah covered her head and neck with her hands,
eyes shut tightly. Brittany just lay there unconscious. A few seconds
later everything fell silent, leaving only three prone net.heroines, and
badly damaged street.
The silence continued for almost a full minute, then Savannah
slowly sat upright, staring at the wreckage before her. The force field
around Hans's Nifty Collectibles went down, and the storekeeper
(assumedly Hans) walked out to them.
" You heroes out there alright? Heh? Anybody there?" he peered
uncertainly through the still settling dust.
" We're all right sir, just give us a moment to catch our
breath," said Savannah loudly, and nudged Brit. Brittany mumbled
something and propped herself up on her elbows.
" Wha' happen?" she looked blurrily around.
" The robot threw you, then it blew up."
" Oh. S'nice. Wh'rs Payt'?"
" Oh my. Paytan! Perdition! are you okay?" yelled Savannah out
into the slowly settling dust.
" Oh I'm just _great_. I'm just _dandy_. Damn sword!" something
clanged loudly against the pavement," A 'little help' didn't mean abandon
me in mid-swing! Hell," said Paytan as she limped towards them, using the
sword as a cruch. Bruises were already darkening on the side of her face
and arms. She looked _really_ angry. Hans took one look at her and
started backing up.
" Well, you net.heros have done it again, heh? Saved the city.
Much thanks. I will be going back to my store now," he continued glancing
at them uneasily until her reached the door to his store. Paytan helped
Brittany stand, then supported her when she began to sway gently back and
forth. Suddenly Savannah's face whitened.
" Oh no!" she cried," Binky!" Brit looked at her.
" Wha' about 'im?"
" You brought him with you when we left didn't you? You don't
have him now, so something must have hapened to him!"
" Oh, H's behind th'lampost," Brit stumbled towards where the
lampost had last been seen. She found it a minute later.
The light itself had been shattered in the blast, the metal pole
twisting and tearing free of the cement base, embedding itself into a
wall a few yards away like a deranged pretzel. The cement base itself had
been broken, some of it crushed to dust, and the grass surrounding it had
gone to the great compost pile in the sky. Binky's fishbowl stood in
the center of the destruction, covered in a fine layer of dust. Binky
himself burbled gently inside. Brittany picked him up.
" Told ya. Cosmic forces c'n take anything. Can't dey wuvums? Yef
dey can, yef yef yef. He's a bwave widdle cosmic power isn't he? Yef he
is!" she crooned at the fishbowl. Paytan groaned, tugged on Savannah's
sleeve, and the three of them (with fish/cosmic power) headed back
towards headquarters, leaving a mass of destruction behind them.
_________________________________________________________________________
Binky, Out-of-It Lass, Perdition, and Weirdness Girl, are copyright
Jennifer Whitson, 1995. Fuzzy is Public Domain.
NEXT ISSUE:
Ooooooo, the crossover begins! We do exist in continuity, we do!
Savannah's power defined! And Paytan's too, if you're lucky.
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.sig is living in jungle with pack of wolves and refuses to come back.
