Legion of Net.Heroes Volume 2 #46 : A 24 Minute Comic

[LNH][Contest] Legion of Net.Heroes Volume 2 #46:  A 24 Minute Comic
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| |-| []                        /                #46
| | | [] egion of               \       'A Spoonful of Mischief'
| | | []__ [] []   []  []       / (Part of High Concept Challenge #26)
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| | |      []\ ]   [ __ ]       /    written by and copyright 2012
| |-|      [] []   []  []       \           Saxon Brenton
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| | Cover shows three lemurs.  One of them is wearing glasses=2C one of=20
| | them is carrying a bottle of grape juice=2C and the third has a spoon.
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     From the personal files of Cheesecake-Eater Lad:
     "I knew things were going wrong when I heard the 'Frink' from the=20
back of the LNH-HQ's walk-in refrigerator store-room.
     " 'Who's there?' I demanded.  The only reply was muffled giggling.=20
Some supervillain or other=2C no doubt.  Well=2C just because the head-
quarters of the Legion of Net.Heroes attracted villainous ne'er-do-wells=20
like flies didn't mean that they'd be allowed to get the better of the=20
heroes.
     "I backed into some shadows and then silently leapt up onto some=20
tall shelving.  Okay=2C yes=2C I know I'm a bit overweight.  But my ninja=20
training gives me stealth that my opponents usually don't - can't  -=20
credit to a fat man. =20
     "I ghosted along=2C following the sounds of the giggling until I came=
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upon my opponents.  They were a trio of lemurs (one of them wearing horn=20
rim glasses)=2C and they had stolen several bottles of grape juice.  More=20
importantly=2C they somehow knew I was there=2C and had shaken up one of=20
the bottles until it was full of pressurised carbonation bubbles=2C and=20
then they unscrewed the top in my direction.
     "I catapulted out of the way as the fizzy=2C grape flavoured soft=20
drink fountained and splattered all over the shelving where I had been. =20
As I flew through the air I threw a number of spoons at them.  I may not=20
be as good at spoonjitsu as Decibel Dude's girlfriend=2C Samantha Spoon=20
was=2C but the spoons hit their mark squarely into the wall on either side=
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of the three lemur=92s heads=2C and then stuck there=2C quivering with a=20
satisfying malice.
     " 'All right=2C that was just for starters=2C' I said=2C as I lightly=
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bounded down to the floor with enough spoons for a second volley if it=20
became necessary.  'Do you surrender?  Or do I have to get rough?'
     "The troublesome trio of lemurs put up their hands in a sign of=20
surrender as they decided not to be troublesome anymore."
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     "So that's what happened=2C" Cheesecake-Eater Lad said as he finished=
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his story to Occultism Kid and Fearless Leader. =20
     Occultism Kid nodded.  "I think I know what's going on.  You're=20
aware that the Superguy altiverses have had very little activity over=20
the past few years?"
     Cheesecake-Eater Lad nodded=2C somewhat sadly.  There were so many=20
story imprints that had dwindled away from lack of interest over the=20
last twenty years.
     "Well=2C apparently some of the lemurs have been abandoning ship=2C=20
heading off to other imprints=2C" said Occultism Kid.  He looked pointedly=
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at the three lemurs=2C who were now watching the net.heroes from inside a=20
steel cage box.
     "Well by rights we should deport them back to their home=20
dimension=2C" said Fearless Leader.
     "That's hardly fair if their universe is about to run down from=20
lack of interest=2C" protested Cheesecake-Eater Lad.
     "I hardly think the altiverses are in any danger of dying=2C" said=20
Fearless leader.
     "I agree=2C" said Occultism Kid.  "If nothing else=2C the squirrels=20
don't seem to be particularly worried=2C and they've got a far better grip=
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on the metaphysics of these things."
     "Okay=2C so let's get the paperwork sorted out for sending them=20
back...  Hey=2C we've they go?" demanded Fearless Leader as he suddenly=20
realised that the cage was empty.
     "Look!" said Cheesecake-Eater Lad=2C pointing at a hairpin on the=20
floor.  "They must have picked the lock!"
     "I'll  use a spell to track them=2C" said Occultism Kid.  "They can't=
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have gotten far."
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     They hadn't=2C but they didn't need to.
     The troublesome trio raced down the halls (tripping up Bad-Timing=20
Boy in the process) when they came to an open door.  A door that=20
shouldn't have been open.  They scampered inside=2C and came face to face=20
with the awesome contents of the Legion's Plot Device Room.
     "Woooo=2C" the lemurs went.  Then they heard the Legionnaires in=20
pursuit behind them.  They ran further into the Plot Device Room=2C and=20
happened upon an inter-dimensional portal generator=2C which most=20
certainly shouldn't have been on like that.  They raced towards it. =20
Along the way one of the lemurs picked up one of the numerous artefacts=20
that were stored in the room: The Spoon of Destiny of Looniearth-A.  And=20
then the three lemurs and the Spoon went through the portal into=20
Looniearth-20=2C to make mischief in a brand new imprint.
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Character credits:
     Cheesecake-Eater Lad created by Matthew Jotham Millheiser.
     Fearless Leader created by Dave Van Domelen.
     Occultism Kid created by Josh Guerink.
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Author's notes:
     Written for the 26th High Concept Challenge: a 24 minute comic=20
starting with the line "I knew things were going wrong when..."
     This is the second story I tried for HCC26=2C and was written in 24=20
minutes exactly.  (Editing=2C spellchecking=2C and copy'n'pasting in the=20
logo took extra time=2C naturally.)  The first was a story involving a flyi=
ng=20
cargo ship caught in a silt storm in a fantasy setting=2C but I ran out of=
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time about halfway through=2C indicating that I really didn't have a=20
proper sense of how long it would take me to whip off a particular=20
amount of text.
     Only after I finished writing did I realise that Occultism Kid's=20
summary of the lemurs isn't actually all that complete.  Yes=2C they're a=20
running gag=2C but upon reflection and after some fact checking it could=20
be accurately said that their original home is the usenet newsgroup=20
alt.fan.lemurs.
     (Handwavy rationalisation)  From there they spread out=2C=20
including to the Superguy writing group mailing list (which as far as=20
shared universe writing group's go is rec.arts.comics.creative's elder=20
sibling=2C and for the last few years has been on low ebb and kept alive=20
mainly by the efforts of Gary W. Olson).  (Even more handwavy=20
rationalisation)  If we posit that only a few of the more panicky Superguy=
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lemur population have decided to bail=2C and that some have gone 'back=20
to the old country'=2C then this explains why only a small number have=20
turned up elsewhere.
     By contrast the various factions of squirrel super scientists and=20
magicians showed up mainly in Dvandom's old _Crazy Guy_ and=20
_Exarchs_ series for the Superguy imprint.
     Anyway=2C the premise - that some but not all of the lemurs are=20
starting to abandon Superguy for still active imprints - is an off the=20
cuff piece of silliness that I threw out sometime last year.  The notion=20
of throwing the whole mess into the brand new LNH20 imprint to=20
further complicate the 'Spoon Of Destiny' cascade is a piece of=20
mischief that occurred to me within the last hour.
     What=2C you though the story title referred to the *lemurs* making=20
mischief?
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Saxon Brenton   University of Technology=2C city library=2C Sydney Australi=
a
     saxon.brenton@uts.edu.au     saxonbrenton@hotmail.com
"These 'no-nonsense' solutions of yours just don't hold water in a complex
world of jet-powered apes and time-travel." - Superman=2C JLA Classified #3
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